opinion
When Barack Hussein Obama's name came up for US president, I made a dash for my book shelf and pulled out a moth-eaten hardcover. It was my pedigree. Slapping away the dust, I settled on the veranda with a gourd of palm wine and a saucer of kola nuts.
I started off with Barack. Flip, flip, flip and I remembered that we had no name in our clan that came close to Barack. Out with that. Hussein. We had never been Islamic in any way except having neighbours who were Moslems, whom we used to fondly call the "Capped Men" (their d**ks looked like they were wearing a cap)
No, no Moslem blood flowing in the clan. My father was once a protestant but dropped it all with his baptismal name and joined the St. Bottle's Church of the glory of St. Bacchus.
Hussein? Hussein? Where had I heard this name before? Yes! My step-grandfather! His name was Abdullah! There! That was a Moslem thread, wasn't it?
But my step-grandpa had died without having a baby of his own, so that cuts off any likelihood of even a distant relationship with Obama. That is all right. I was left with Obama.
Yes, Obama is a Cameroonian name by all means. Let me see, Oba...? Yes, I had a cousin called Obang. That's close! Isn't it? But that was too long ago in East Africa. What of it? If I am right, Obama has Luo blood running in his veins (Nyongoma Kogelo) you know the location of that village? On the shores of Lake Ukerewe. And I have lots of Luo haemoglobin in my blood. That's it! We could be cousins!
By the time I shook the "mbirikot" (dregs) from the bottom of the gourd and chewed the last lobe of kola, I wasn't too sure I was related to Obama by a mile. What happened to me is likely happening to many other Africans.
In the words of Joseph Warungu, BBC Focus on Africa's Editor-in-Chief, Africans must be "throwing genes into the Obama equation" with solutions like "Obama is my cousin", "I went to school with Obama's uncle's classmate" and all the like. For Africans, it is only natural to gravitate towards kinship. And for good reason too; we are soul brothers and soul sisters.
And Obama surely knows that. Obama's only luck is that he is in far away America where kinship might as well stop at the family door. If he was in Africa, you would be sure that hundreds of "relatives" would have already pitched camp close to the State House, while others would have dispatched thousands of letters introducing themselves as one relation or the other. You are lucky, Obama.
Beacon of Hope
If any dark skinned man never had confidence in himself and denigrated himself for being black; lacked cultural fortitude and suffered from cultural kwashiorkor, felt inadequate and inferior, Obama's cultural fortitude and audacity to change things are worthy to emulate.
It is time for change! Obama's audacity is simply irresistible. But Africa, being what it is, might not emulate Obama's vision for change to renew itself. That much I know, because when I set out to talk to people I thought were intelligent, the impression I left with was "Obama is ours!"
What they were trying to say, without saying it, was "more largesse!" I tell you, this thing about begging is our undoing. We seem to have been programmed to always beg, beg, beg, beg!
Let me tell you something. Besides, being an American by situation and by conviction, Obama ceased to be an individual the day he was elected president of America. He is now America, not president for Africa! In any case, he became president because the American people guaranteed an enabling environment.
You know, America is big and everything about it, is big! The land is big, the people are big, they have big minds, big houses, big lawns and big cars and big roads. Everything in America is the biggest in the world. You can bet on that. Consequently, America's problems are the biggest in the world. And Obama has inherited a whole load of them.
You see, George W. Bush had quite a hell of a time to cavort and mess around. He has left a long murky trail and Obama has tons of shovelling to do - he has to dowse the financial meltdown; there are three war fronts to take care of.
And the "Coke" guys in Columbia and Afghanistan! And the "demon" in Iran? With all these problems filling the presidential menu, Obama's engagement with Africa will only be like dessert - optional. Of course, powers can be delegated.
One thing though that everyone seems to agree on is that Obama, however absorbed he may be with America's gigantic problems, should persuade his African adult delinquent uncles to retire honourably to their villages. I mean the long-serving sub-Saharan African leaders.
I don't know whether you knew this; African leaders are the most feared creatures on God's earth. They have, on occasions, found themselves to blame for leaving behind them political chaos in their own countries. Obama should know this.
The youths in Africa have been raising a hue and cry about how the ruling elites subjugate and demoralise them. I doubt if it would please Obama to hear this. Let me give you a quick list of the hangers-on: Jose Eduardo dos Santos of Angola took power on September 21, 1979, after winning election under one-party system;
Blaise Compaore of Burkino Faso took power in 1987 after Thomas Sankara was assassinated (Sankara had led a coup in1983); Paul Biya of Cameroon took over when Ahmadou Ahidjo resigned in 1982; Denis Sassou-Nguesso of the Republic of Congo ruled from 1979 until a 1992 election defeat, then seized power again in 1997 with Angolan help; Teodoro Obiang Nguema of Equatorial Guinea seized power in a 1979 coup. His government is considered among Africa's worst human rights violators.
Omar Bongo of Gabon ascended to presidency on December 2, 1967 after his predecessor's death. He is a quiet intimidator; Omar al-Bashir of Sudan has led the country since a 1989 Islamist military coup and King Mswati III of Swaziland is Africa's last absolute monarchy. He has led the country since 1986. Yoweri Kaguta Museveni of Uganda led an insurgency to take power in 1986. He is planning to go for a third term in 2011.
Then, of course, there is old Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe, who has been the country's only leader since 1980 when it gained independence from Britain. Not forgetting Yahya Jammeh of The Gambia, who toppled Sir Dawda Jawara in 1994 with his so-called "soldiers with a difference."
He has broken all the promises he made to curb corruption, restore democracy and the rule of law along with transparency, probity and accountability, replacing them with harrowing poverty and political repression.
Please, Obama, if there is nothing else you can do for Mother Africa, at least, persuade your uncles to embrace peaceful change.For us Africans, after the Obama euphoria, let's get back to our farms and the drawing board, and stop begging!
